Thursday, February 26, 2009

Breaking the Cycle

He would not let anyone pet him but me
He did not like being tied to a tree
He would put his soft muzzle on my knee
He would lick my salty tears lovingly

To break the cycle was up to me
It would not matter if God heard my plea
I wanted all my worries to flee
He died when my baby was inside of me

I thought he was the only one who let me BE
But when our family became three
I found that my baby and me
Connected like me and Free

In memory of my dog, Freedom

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Another Secret

No one in my family knows that I blog
Not even the cousins who live in smog
Life is a wheel not only one cog
I write about nature and kissing a frog
I will try to keep all my friends in a fog
And if they find out I will live in a log

Saturday, February 21, 2009

The Other Stuff

I don't get involved
Especially with guys who have not evolved
Girls don't want to be treated like objects
I would rather be sendin' projects

After I reach my deadpoint
I clean up in the bathroom at Redpoint
I will never forget the nice guy at the shop
I told him a few things about my pop

He told me climbing on granite and basalt
Would help me deal with battery and assault

It would be hard to live with me
I have a bad case of OCD

I sleep alone in my car
To hide my invisible scar

What I really want is some one's protection
What I really crave is Island affection

For CG, the nice guy at the shop

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Bad Day

To the first sorry hole
Who took a piece of my Soul
You are a work of art
Do you know how much you took apart?

I wish I could go ghetto all over your ass
Everything coming out of my mouth would be brass
But ingrained in me is act with class

Born of a liar and an alcoholic beater
Ironic that you've never met another girl that's sweeter
But if you lie to me or touch my knee
I will show you a different side of me

I learned long ago not to feel
The mind will distort what is real
Don't ever let it show
Cuz this is how you grow
Keep it all inside
I might as well take cyanide

I would not let you have that power
That is why I cry only in the shower

I go through Life like a thief
I am numb beyond belief
When I peed on a stick, I felt grief
If I died now, it would be a relief

Would I do the same to thee
Cuz the apple does not roll far from the tree?

This Road

He would not leave me
This guy I don't feel for
But then came a baby
Is this the time to show him the door?

I built these protective walls
Decorated them with bikes, boards, and volleyballs
I even remember dancing in the halls

After more that twenty years of keeping this pace
It appeared as if we were winning the race
But if you look close I needed some space

When our kids went out on their own
I found that I wanted to be all alone

I started going on solo trips with the car
That's when you find out who you are

Thinking about the road not taken causes anxiety
Maybe I should just give more to society

I don't know how this will end
But I no longer want to pretend

Deleted

I think I am in his delete pile
For I haven't heard from him in a long while
I won't let this cramp my style
I think the guy possessed too much bile

In my longing for a good mate
I pondered, squandered, and canceled a date
I don't think he intended to relate
Most likely it would have a ruinous fate

Should I feel incomplete
Cuz he chose to delete?
Amazing how this affects how I eat

Stuff

I'm a girl living under the Sun
Always looking for fun
No need for a gun
Just learn how to run!

Don't own anything by Prada
I only wear Prana
Cuz I want to be like Sharma
You know we all wanna

I am certifiable
That is undeniable
Sitting here on this ledge
Man, I'm really close to the edge

Don't want to be the one who misled
I'm just fighting hard not to be dead

Thanks CS and JC

Herstory

Every scar tells a story
Every story leaves a scar
Written on the Body
They remind us who we are

When I was a kid I loved looking at the sky
Searching for a comet
Just like you I couldn't guess why
My dad made me eat my own vomit

My big brada, he got it the worse
I would pray to God, "How do you get rid of this curse?"
Now that he has his own son
I really wish the cycle was done

My parents no doubt would appeal
That they were just doing their best
At least I know now how to deal
If you choose to molest

My temple is bruised and battered
My clothes old and tattered
But I won't let my dreams be shattered

All it takes is one more try
All it takes is one big break
Either learn how to fly
Or drown by the lake

Snowboy

The man at the Meadow told me he does not cry
I did not ask him, "Why, oh, why?"
For someone who comes on too strong
I felt that there was something wrong

The man at the Meadow likes to take pictures
Earthscapes or creatures?
A hidden agenda?
A girl named Brenda?

True beauty, grace, and strength lie beneath what the eye can see.

So I set him free
Let him be
Even though his Corazon is still in me.

Secrets

No one around
Engaging with the rock
Escaping from exploitations, violations
Broken promises, crooked world

You are what you are when nobody is looking.
Sobbing before
Sometimes after
Never during

Dark side
Pulling
Down
Hard

Cut. Burn. Pull. Beat. Why do I . . .?
Blades. Butts. Hair. Hand. How do I stop?

Seeking pain management from Mother Nature
To cope with invisible scars left by human nature

Slowly piecing my Soul back together
Searching for the Truth
Just want to feel whole

No one's gonna save me but me.

Thanks AV for pointing out that one's pain is always about another person's power.